Waiting...

Im the worst waiter. I don’t know what it is but I can not wait anymore. The minute I feel like im waiting for something or someone, I get this anxiety that comes over me. My stomach gets turned and I can’t sit still. I just feel uneasy for some odd reason.

Growing up we were always taught, “being on time is being late.” Now that I am older, I feel that, that saying is true in its own sense. At the same time, I feel that it is making apprehensive when it comes to waiting for things to get done. Ill do my part and write an email to a co-worker only for them to take two days for them to send me something back all while Im getting hassled that something is not done. I wrote up our newsletter last week and I put it on two people’s desks for review. I wanted someone to proof read what I made and make sure it is what we want. Before leaving for the weekend last weekend, the boss came and asked me where it was. I told him I was waiting for my peer review edits to come back so I can print them up. I showed him a brief copy of what I had made thus far and he made comments right there on the go. That was all I was asking for. Today I made the changes he suggested and now Im printing a bunch of copies out on my 1980 color printer. It has taken 45 minutes to print 10 colored copies.

Another part of my anxiety that I have developed is waiting for people to call/text me back. I don’t know why I get weird-ed out about people calling me back or not but it has just started making me feel weird. I always try to call people back or text them back, I know im bad at this too, it just makes me feel awkward. I think a big part of this is because I casually date and the girls who I would like to see again and this phone/text game thing. I really don’t understand it myself but it is something that I have to go through to try and meet a decent girl. I wish all these games were put to the side and I could find a pretty awesome girl without all the needless games.

When all is said and done, I think my biggest problem is that I have a job were I am by myself for the majority of the time. Most of the jobs I have ever had were like this but not it is wearing on me. Ever hear the phrase, if you have a question ask a cowboy. I feel like I am becoming that cowboy. I drive around all day and listen to the radio and think about people I meet, will meet, who I met, and I am always curious of what they are doing. I know most people are busy during the day and can’t talk or have weird hours that don’t match mine, but I still would like to talk to whomever.

With all of this said, it is now time for lunch and I have to wait another 7 minutes to order it. Im always waiting on something…